People like MaryAnn have been writing about Brené Brown’s newest book, Rising Strong. In it, she asks, “do you think people are doing the best they can with the tools they have?” She says there are two distinct answers, a resounding absolutely not or a qualified yes.
We’ve had an issue with soccer this season. The AYSO (all volunteer organization) changed fields. The new contract with the new field has been problematic, and AYSO has been moved off the field in favor of Club teams, making our league miss game after game. It has been messy and frustrating. People are talking about how they are just going to sign up for the next town over’s league next season. I get it, but here’s the thing:
I think they’re doing the best they can. Yes, there have been unexpected problems and it has been frustrating. Yes, I wonder why they switched from a field they had to themselves to a busy field. But I truly believe they have our best interests at heart and thought they were doing the best thing they could. And, I’m not enough of a sports’ person to care. If my kids are practicing with a team and getting exercise and learning a game and getting to play sometimes, if I don’t have to spend quite as many Saturdays on the field, I might just be okay with that. (But don’t tell anyone.)
But this and my students this quarter have kind of made me realize that I do believe people are doing the best they can with the tools they have. To believe that is how I was raised, and it’s in my personality. It’s not that I don’t think we all can learn to do better, but I think most of us are trying hard, doing the best we can.